April 21 — You've noticed a change in your child's behavior: He seems to become frustrated more easily. He becomes angry at his younger sister for no reason at all. He talks about "getting" someone he dislikes at school. He runs across busy intersections without looking. What is going on?
'Violent behavior in a child at any age always needs to be taken seriously.' — AACAP
ALL ARE WARNING signs of violent behavior, according to psychology experts. With the recent school shootings, people all over the country may be looking at their loved ones and wondering if they're at risk.
The problem:
Nevertheless, experts say, it is better to be safe than sorry. Violent behavior in a child at any age always needs to be taken seriously, says the American Academy of Child and Adolescent Psychiatry.
Victims of violence are most likely to be between the ages of 12 and 24. According to MTV: Music Television research, violence is the number one concern overall among its viewers. And, in a recent American Psychological Association poll, 40 percent of youth say they have been concerned about a potentially violent classmate.
The survey also showed that nearly three in four youths want to learn the warning signs of violent behavior.
According to the APA, "violence is a serious possibility" in children who exhibit the following warning signs:
And the potential for violence exists in many others, the group says. Children who are in a gang or even who have a strong desire to be in a gang are at risk. If they start withdrawing from friends and usual activities, they are at risk. Even youngsters who suddenly start getting bad grades could be prone to violence — you just can't be sure unless you seek professional help.
While there is no formula for pinpointing exactly who will become violent, numerous studies have homed in on certain factors, the AACAP says. Among them:
Previous aggressive or violent behavior.
Coping with anger
Experts suggest these tips for dealing with anger without resorting to violence:
Talk about your feelings — if you can't find the right words to describe what you're going through, find a trusted friend or adult to help you one-on-one.
Express yourself calmly — express criticism, disappointment, anger or displeasure without losing your temper or fighting.
Listen to others — listen carefully and respond without getting upset when someone gives you negative feedback. Try to see the other person's point of view.
Negotiate — work out your problems with someone else by looking at alternative solutions and compromises.
Youths who grow up in extremely stressful circumstances — living in poverty with a single, unemployed parent whose family has cut him off, for example — are also at risk, the experts say.
Anyone who recognizes any of the warning signs for violent behavior in their children or themselves, should get help right away, the psychologists stress. Among those qualified to help are a guidance counselor, teacher, school psychologist, coach, clergy or school resource officer.
"Violence is a learned behavior, and like any learned behavior, it can be changed," says Russ Newman, executive director for professional practice at the APA. "In order to do that, though, it is important to recognize the warning signs of violence and to get help before violence occurs." Sources: APA, AACAP
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